Trapezium Brewing, St Petersburg VA. A hidden gem.

After leaving Miami at 1am in the morning, for a long drive to Fairfax, Virginia Trapezium Brewing was a welcomed sight at 5.40pm in the evening.

The day had been long, but the end was in sight; I couldn’t wait to try some delicious beer and eat some good pizza with my favorite companion.

I came upon this brewery randomly, and I’m proud to say that I really hit the brewery jackpot.

Nestled in the most quaint and beautiful area of St. Petersburg Virginia – where the coffee shops and restaurants seemed to be built into old factory buildings – this brewery is beautiful.

Out of all of the breweries in the surrounding areas I chose this one because it seemed unique; the name alone was chosen after a house called the ‘trapezium’.

The trapezium house is a short drive from the brewery, built in the 1700s it has no parallel walls and absolutely no right angles.

It is said that the owner had a West Indian servant who believed evil spirits resided in the corners, and so therefore the house was made wonky; everything from the fireplace, windowpanes, stairs, and just about every part of the house are slightly crooked or off balance one way or another.

And so the Brewery was named back in 2016 when it originally opened; the building had previously been an ice manufacturer since the late 1800s to late 1900s, but had been vacant for some time.

To look at the beautiful interior of the two story brewery you’d never suspect it was ever anything else.

The inside is trickled with fairy lights, giving it a great ambience, and almost a circus feel; it’s very open and the pizza oven is a strikingly elegant main feature behind all of the patient taps.

The smell of pizza lingered in the air all around as my husband and I took a seat at the end of the bar; it was Monday night and we seemed to be the only people visiting so far.

The menu was a list of delicious pizzas, all made fresh and in house with local ingredients. I could hardly concentrate enough to pick my beer as I watched the pizza making take place in the background behind the bar, almost drooling into my lap.

It was a hard choice, but after a few back and forths we decided to order the ‘Bonneville’ – a pizza topped with red sauce, pepperoni, prosciutto, and five cheeses!

You couldn’t get much better than that, and as I ordered a Lucky 75 Lemon honey ginger beer I leaned back in my seat ready for the wait.

It felt glorious to be out of the Jeep after such a long drive, and even just sat there in silence from exhaustion was the best feeling in the world.

We’d made it, and finally it was our favorite part of the week… a brewery visit.

The pizza arrived quickly but instead of the Bonneville they had mistaken our order as the Bonneville deluxe; I thought it looked heavenly, but with my husband not being a fan of sausage we informed the waitress who apologized and fixed it right away.

In fact, she was so quick with the swap that the second pizza was in front of us within 5 minutes. I couldn’t get over the speed. 20/10 for customer service.

It was cheesy, it was greasy, it was light and crispy, it was basically everything we had been looking for when we walked in the door.

The pepperoni and prosciutto gave off their salty scents as I lowered my face closer for a sniff, but the pizza was so fresh out of the oven that I’d surely regret an immediate bite into that molten lava.

Instead I picked up my Honey lemon ginger beer and stared longingly towards that ooey gooey beauty.

The beer was great, it had a lot of floral notes upon the first hit of the tongue, and as the ginger hit my tastebuds the honey wasn’t far behind with an after bite that resided on my palate for a while, making me long for another delicious sip; it was an easy drinker.

After my first beer was destroyed, and a second on the way, I decided the molten lava layer of cheese had cooled down enough for me to finally take that first bite.

I picked up the slice like a newborn baby with both hands and eagerly pushed it into my mouth.

Sweet mother of pizza, get in my face hole!

It was HEAVENLY!

That crisp crunch of homemade dough was music to my ears; it was so fresh and perfectly made that I will forever be upset with any store bought or chain pizza in the future.

Trapeziums dough game is strong.

The cheese was perfectly blended with traditional mozzarella and a few stronger cheeses that really gave a perfect taste with every bite, complimenting the salty meats fabulously; I’m almost positive I tasted Parmesan and pecorino Romano on there.

As I devoured slice after slice, regretting our sharing decision, and eyeing up the menu for another victim, I noticed a lot of people coming into the brewery for ‘to go’ pizzas. Brilliant! If I was a local I’d be here every week for my pizza fix, and I’m glad that the brewery have it as an option… who needs dominos anymore?! Nobody!

With our pizza plate empty we decided our next victim would be a flight, aware that we couldn’t drink a pint of every beer, but wanting so badly to try them all in excited childlike fashion.

And as the sun began to set we chose to sit on the patio in order to watch the remains of this long day slip away; it was the perfect decision.

On our flight of many colors we chose a staple to the brewery along with some quirky picks to stir up the pot.

From left to right we had – Lucky 63 Boathouse oyster ale, Lucky 39 flagship IPA, Lucky 26 salted caramel brown, and finally Lucky 43 Lucky desperado IPA.

My husband picked up the oyster ale first, and I watched on in curiosity as he took the first sip.

The oyster ale is made using leftover oyster shells from a restaurant called the ‘Boathouse’ added into a blonde ale. The menu states that you should not drink the beer if you have an allergy to shellfish; this thing is serious.

With all that in mind I just couldn’t begin to actually get my mind around it. I was dumbfounded, with no idea or guess on what the taste would be.

With the glass in my hand I took a sniff. It smelt as though a sea breeze had just blown by on the shore, and I could smell the salty water as though it was right there in front of me at the brewery.

The taste was very similar; I got a heavy oyster brine taste at the end of every sip, and was amazed at just how much the oysters had merged into this quirky beer.

I’m not sure I’d be able to drink a whole pint of it, but it was definitely the most interesting beer I’ve ever had in my life, and one I’ll remember forever.

Up next I tried the Flagship IPA; I got a strong taste of chamomile on my tastebuds, along with hoppy goodness – it was strong and it was bold. I enjoyed it so much that I drank the remaining half glass in a couple of big gulps, emptying it quickly.

Next was the salted caramel brown; I’d been waiting for this one hoping that it wasn’t too sickly.

I sniffed the glass first, immediately having flashbacks to my time in Louisville Kentucky stood in front of a taffy pulling machine; it smelt like a candy store of fudgey heaven.

My prayers had been answered. The first sip was glorious, not too sweet at all, and very pleasant indeed. I could have definitely drank a whole pint of it, and I had to stop myself from going and ordering another.

Last but not least was the Lucky desperado IPA. I was eager to try it as I read the description of the brewing process; this beer was fermented with wild yeast in red wine barrels, what could sound better than that?

I loved it. The first sip was so smooth and delicious I once again finished my half of the glass way too quickly.

This beer was like the supreme IPA. Imagine a store branded version of a product, and then imagine a high class top of the line version of that product with all the thrills and love.

This was the top shelf, classy, perfected IPA. The A list of IPAs. The red wine lingered in the aftertaste and I marked it down as a solid win. This IPA had been brewed perfectly, putting all other IPAs to shame.

With our flight empty we shared our compliments of all the great beers Trapezium had thankfully brewed to share with the world. So much so that we decided to have one last pint before we ended the night.

This time we chose ‘Neverland’ their first ever sour, fermented with Sauvignon blanc grape must, and conditioned in Cabernet Sauvignon barrels – beautiful!

Neverland did not disappoint. It was tart, it was fruity, and the red wine lingered in the background of every gulp.

It was the perfect way to end the night for two tired travelers.

As we paid our tab inside we noticed that the brewery had a ‘to – go’ fridge, which was stocked with their whole line of beers.

Perfect! But we were ready with growlers in hand and took two 64oz fills. One of course was Neverland, and the second the Lucky desperado IPA.

With one last look around the interior, I was sad to know we could not make it back for a second trip within the week, but adamant that we’d be back soon regardless.

There’s some magic happening at Trapezium Brewery, and their love and dedication is reflected in the taste and quality of both beer and pizza.

If you live close by or find yourself in the area then go, it’s not to be missed, and don’t forget to buy a flight so you can sample the amazing selection of beers available to you before making your pint pick; you’ll be surprised at just how good and different each one can be.

Trapezium, you where a gift from up above on our long drive up from Miami.

Thank you a million times over for all of the deliciousness.

We will be back, mark my word.

Until next time,

Mrs. Conley

(Don’t forget, if you like what you see, follow my Facebook page @ A Hangry Wife.)

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